Peace is a Fully Stocked Bathroom

Training: Week 2, Day 4
Time: 1.5 hours
Distance: 18.67 miles
Weather: 56 and sunny
Power Song: Wolf Like Me by TV on the Radio

My plan is to blog everyday that I train. It's during this time that I think the most of my life with colitis. That's why my postings fluxuate between the past and present. This window of time gives me permission to feel sorry for myself, because let's face it life with a chronic illness isn't up lifting, I don't care how positive your outlook is. Trust me, if willing yourself into health was all it took, I would be an Olympic Healer.

So when I'm on my bike I think about all these things: Why me? Why my family? Why? Why? Why?

Sometimes I'm overwhelmed with anger. And sorrow. And I grieve.


But then after I dwell on my questions, I drop them along the roadside. Because the answer to most of my questions is simple:

Because that's how my life has played out.

I could continue to carry all of my angry, resentment, and fear with me. But I have a lot of training hours to put in for Get Your Guts in Gear, and those emotions are heavy. And they are holding me back. And I'm ready to shed them along the road, because after eight years I'm ready to embrace a simple truth:

Colitis is something that happened to me, it's not who I am.