Caught in the Bathroom with No Toliet Paper

Thoughtful Dad- always there to capture the priceless moments.

November 18-27, 2003 is an opium induced haze for me. Only flashes of my time in the hospital have stuck with me.

There was a nurse that reminded me of a really bitchy Elton John.

There was a really nice nurse that wasn't very knowledgeable, but she was nice so it got her far.

And then there was a really knowledgeable nurse that figured out I was vomiting because I was allergic to morphine.

My friend Nicole came to visit and put her newborn baby on the bed next to me and I remember thinking that wasn't a good idea.

On Thanksgiving Day I was told I had to eat solid food and hold it down for eight hours before I could go home, so I choked down 5 spoonfuls of mashed potatoes and 3 bites of turkey then made myself hold it down so I could go home. I threw it all up in my parent's driveway.

My memories of my first week home aren't much clearer. My father missed my brother's college graduation because I spiked a temperature before the ceremony and someone had to stay home with me. Even though Gabe is younger than me, he still graduated from college first. He was the first to graduate from college in my family, one of my Dad's greatest desires, and he missed it because of me. To this day I wish I take back everything and give that moment back to my Dad and brother.

People came to visit, but I didn't want to see them convinced they'd ask to see my colostomy bag. Or worst yet, notice I had a colostomy bag through my clothes. I spent a lot of time vomiting.

And then something went wrong with my ostomy. The skin around it burned and my bag wouldn't attach solidly to my stoma. My ostomy nurses discovered that my stoma was leaking and digestive fluids were burning my flesh.

Normally, a total colectomy with an ileoanalpouch patient is given anywhere from four months to a year to heal before their colostomy reversal surgery. Not me. My surgeon determined that making repairs to my stoma would be just as traumatic to my body as taking it down.

Four weeks to the day after my surgery I had my "take down". That was the earliest possible date for a safe take down.

Having my take down early was a good/bad thing for me. A colostomy bag was very damaging to me mentally. It was a constant warm, mushy reminder that my body was no longer normal. I didn't want to turn 24 with a colostomy bag. It is the height of unsexy. The take down greatly improved my disposition.

The bad part about my early take down was that I didn't have that reminder pressing against my body, reminding me that, "Hey, you just put your body through hell for the last three years, and are recovering from major surgery. Take it easy!"

Without a colostomy bag, I could ignore what was really going on with my recovery. Oh, course I was sore, I had a six inch incision from my navel to my pelvis, but that's was just muscle soreness- athletes experience soreness during training. Yes, I was in the bathroom every 45 minutes while my small intestine adjusted to being the superstar of the digestion tract- but that was nothing new.

So when I got a call from my college advisor telling me there was an opening for a student teacher at a brand new alternative high school, during its opening semester, and it was mine if I wanted it-- despite that fact that I was recovering my major surgery-- I took it.

December 16, 2003- Colostomy reversal surgery

December 29, 2003- Turn 24

January 5, 2004- Begin student teaching